The title is something a homeless person said today. Funny thing is, I was not present when it was said and thus, I was not the person it was said to. It was brought up during reflection period, and it really struck a chord in me. When we do charity or service, we have all the good intentions. We sympathize with the people that we are trying to help, we sympathize with the situations that they are in and thats why we want to help them. However, sometimes we go slightly overboard where our sympathy turns to pity or become overbearing. And that I believe is when the people we are trying to help get offended or irritated. They know the situation that they are in, and there is no need for us to rub salt into that wound by pitying them because I guess in a way, that would be taking away their dignity. They have been through many rough experiences and lost much and they don't need to lost that too. These are the thoughts that phrase triggered off in my mind and though I guess I may have known this in theory, there is nothing like a few well chosen words to just put everything into perspective.
If you did not already realize, today was the second day of the Alfonner intercession. Today we did some volunteer work through habitat for humanity and in the evening, we visited a church where we heard the stories of some people who were currently or formerly homeless and then we headed out to a particular park where we handed out hot dogs and coffee to the homeless people. One of the things I really enjoyed about these experiences was actually being able to do service. What I mean by this is that where I come from, service usually involved hosting big events and then donating the money to a charitable foundation. We never actually went out and did things like building houses for other people or handing out to food to those who really need it or even just starting up conversations with them to know about them and their lives. I like it because you can actually see whom your service or hard work is impacting and I found that very rewarding- especially when we got to meet the homeowners of the house we were helping build. It is a very different feeling, something I have never felt before and I am really thankful for the fact that I had the opportunity to experience it. I was really happy that we were able to hand out hot coffee to the homeless and the hot dogs today especially because it was going to be a freeze night.
Which reminds me. Today was COLD. COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD. COLD as I have never experienced with the winds and everything to just freeze you to your bones. I am super thankful to have a warm room to be able to sleep in tonight (and every night) and I really hope that all the people with no place to go have found some sort of shelter against the cold.
Deevya! YOur titled compelled me to read your blog. I loved your insight and perspective of the quote that guy said to me. And I totally agree. I think that so often, in a way, we glorify ourselves and justify al the "service" we are doing, but it's rare for us to draw the distinction between enabling and serving. It's something I definitely struggle with and am trying to learn more about in order to help in the most effective way. During yesterday's reflection, Grace said she had a conversation with someone and their solution to the problem was creating conversation between people from different walks of life. I really hope I keep that in mind during our next event.
ReplyDeleteWow. I really appreciate this blog and your honesty. I think the line between offering a hand out and a hand up is very, very fine. "They know the situation that they are in, and there is no need for us to rub salt into that wound by pitying them because I guess in a way, that would be taking away their dignity. They have been through many rough experiences and lost much and they don't need to lost that too." This way powerful. Respecting some and showing that you genuinely care about their feelings and their emotions does so much more for a person than some would imagine.
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